The One Task I Couldn't Do
by Autumn Xavier
Summary: Regulus must make a difficult decision between his loyalty and his blood...a decision that could cost him his life. Old prequel for a story never to be released.
1. Request

Hey guys! This is my first actual HP fic so I'm not too sure about how it will come out. Now, I had always had this character that I used for RP that was the sister of Malfoy but with the publication of OotP, that idea pretty much got shot to hell so I had to think of another character that was similar but still as tough. So I thought about the new characters mentioned in OotP and one that stuck out like a neon sign in Iowa was Regulus Black. Curious me, I started looked around at current fics about him and to much joy and happiness, there were not that many at the time but my favorite Regulus fic was one called Cor Leonis by Yukirei. I loved the idea of the story and I emailed and asked her if I could repeat the idea as part of my new character's history and she was so nice and agreed. So the idea of why Regulus was killed is hers and not mine and I just kinda altered it, although I have to admit it makes sense. So this fic is a prequel to my unwritten fic, Irony of the Heart. Anyways, I just wanted to point out where credit is not mine and all I ask is that you not only R/R this, but check out Cor Leonis because it's really good! Thanks and enjoy your helping of HP fandom! MAJOR OotP SPOILERS!!!  
  
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It was amazing, looking down at the still pink infant in my arms, the embryonic fluids matting down what little hair the girl had. I looked to my lover, my wife, a goddess in her own right for she had birthed this child from her body, and I could not imagine the pain it must have brought her. "What should we name her, love? A heavenly name would best suit her," I asked, gently taking a seat beside her, holding our daughter between us.  
  
"Demeter...the Earth Goddess of the Harvest. Demeter Ceres Black," she replied, kissing the tiny forehead. It was as if nothing could mar the perfection of the moment until I felt the searing pain in my left arm and I knew that the Dark Lord was calling to us. My desire was not to leave but to stay here beside Athena and our newborn child but should I refuse to go and I would never know the true joys of holding my daughter. With no other choice, I was forced to leave the happiest moment of my life.  
  
***************  
  
I recall the day Demeter had been born perfectly. It has been four years, ten months, thirteen days, sixteen hours, twenty minutes and forty-six seconds since I first held her in my arms, much like I am doing now as I read to her beside the fire. The sweet scent of lavender still lingers in her hair from the bath that Athena had just given her and her skin soft from the glycerine soap.  
  
It was a picturesque scene from that Better Homes and Garden magazine that is popular with the Muggles. A scene that was heartwarming and loving. A father sitting in a chair with his daughter upon his knee with a book between them while the mother sat on the couch beside them, knitting a quilt. Though I doubt Athena would be able to knit by Muggle conventions nor was I the hard working father, unless murder and torture were now acceptable sources of income.  
  
But nevertheless, I enjoy the feeling, the comfort; and despite my occupation of choice, I live a relatively normal life, as far as the wizarding community went. But as with all golden and precious things, my happiness will not be permanent for there has been a prophecy made that has infuriated the Dark Lord. I know the day is inevitable, impossible to avoid and I fear for the life of my daughter and wife.  
  
I look to Demeter, who has fallen asleep in my arms and a smile sweeps across my face. Her tiny fingers have wrapped themselves around my dark locks of hair that hang over my shoulder, a red tie loosely binding them together. I take her hand in mine and marvel at the smallness of it in comparison to mine. She will grow up to be tall and graceful, as has her mother and eventually, she will make one wizard a very happy man.  
  
So enthralled with the preciousness of my daughter, I do not hear Athena rise from the couch and I jump at the warmth of her hand against my own. "She is fast asleep now, with Morpheus to guide her through the dream realm. In time she will come to develop the Sight and she will See as I do," she whispers, resting her head against my shoulder.  
  
"Then let us put to her bed so she may enjoy her childhood dreams, and retire for the night ourselves," I reply, standing from the chair. My balance wavers slightly as pain courses through the arm that supports the weight of my daughter and I know that the mark has turned black once again. My eyes look to Athena and I can tell she is already aware of the call, as psychics were often inclined to do.  
  
I see the frustration rise in her emerald eyes and it is obvious that she has grown weary of competing for my attention with the Dark Lord. Her arms reach out and slid under Demeter's sleeping body and the weight is gone from my arms. "Go, Regulus, for the sooner you answer to his summons, the sooner you will return home," Athena says, her voice soft and calm though the emotions of her eyes are much different. I move to kiss her but she turns and walks from the room, the skirts of her dress flowing behind her and I am alone. A sigh escapes my mouth as I Apparate from the house to answer to my Lord.  
  
***************  
  
A thick fog had surrounded Malfoy Manor as I appeared in the yard just outside of the door. Most of my fellow Death Eaters had already answered and some arrived just as I did. Nervously, my coffee eyes scan the area, looking over the Death Eaters currently present. Lucius and Severus stand a few meters away from me, their heads low in quiet conversation. Antonin and Walden approach me and I make simple conversation, not really caring for the company I am in.  
  
"Do either of you know the reason of this meeting so late?" I ask, looking to make sure that Lord Voldemort was not within hearing distance. I dare not to question his methods before him and I do not wish to learn of the consequences of doing such.  
  
Antonin shrugs and looks to his friend at his side. "Probably the prophecy. Pettigrew's been telling some interesting stories about the Potters. He's been saying that he can hand them over to Lord Voldemort, if he was given a little more time."  
  
I scoff and shake my head, as Travers and Wilkes joined us. "I don't believe Pettigrew, he once associated himself with the likes of the Potters and my brother. He's probably telling lies to ensure that the Dark Lord will meet his downfall. The only person who knows where the Potters now live is Sirius and he has hidden himself well."  
  
Walden begins to speak but our conversation comes to an end as Lord Voldemort has appeared before us. His cold, hateful eyes look over us and I feel a shiver run down my spine. Though I give my loyalty to my Lord, I am still nervous when I am within his presence, a heavy aura of death and power surround him.  
  
Slowly, he raises a pale, thin hand in the air and silence fills the yard. "Welcome, my loyal servants. Come, tonight we will feast to my victory," our Master declares, his voice raspy and harsh, but demanding. Others slowly move towards him, dropping to their knees and kissing the hems of his black robes. I follow in suit, the soil damp with the night dew and staining my new cloak as I grovel before the Dark Lord.  
  
"Rise Regulus, for I have a request of you. I will speak to you as we eat," I hear him tell me and I quickly stand to my feet, though my eyes remain down for I would not match my eyes to his. I bow to him before walking into the Manor. I look to Lucius as he catches up to me, with Severus not far behind him.  
  
"Aren't we the Dark Lord's pet all of a sudden? You seem to have made quite a name for yourself in the last few years with us, haven't you Regulus?" Severus sneers, his face inches from mine. I glare at him, resentment building up within my veins. I want to punch him, just bury my hand in his face and hear the bones crack in that damned crooked nose of his. I envy the person who was lucky enough to break it the first time and wish it had been me.  
  
"I do not know what service I will do for Lord Voldemort, nor do I care as long as it pleases him," I say to him, pushing past Severus to walk into the dining room.  
  
"Smart, as I would hate to see your wife and daughter suffer because you are a failure."  
  
I stop dead in my track, fear and concern taking over any other feeling that I may have currently had. As a Death Eater, not only did we pledge our loyalty to the Dark Lord but our families as well and I had tried to keep Demeter out of my world because I wanted a better life for her. My fists clench together as I turn to look at the two companions and I quickly walk back over to them, my wand already in my hand.  
  
"Don't...you...ever...mention...my...family...again. Do you understand me, Severus? They are not a part of all of...this...and I intend to keep it that way."  
  
I watch as Lucius wraps his arm around his young wife, my cousin. Most of the Black family had come into service under the Dark Lord as we agree with his philosophy of wizardary breeding. I hate Narcissa, and I always have, ever since we were children. She was the type to spill any secrets as long as she benefited from it. Her azure eyes look to me with satisfaction and she only adds to my anger. What right did they have to threaten me or my family?  
  
I stand before one of the mahogany chairs that surround the 30 person table and wait for us to be told to be seated. Lucius and Narcissa stood behind the seats adjacent to Lord Voldemort while Severus sat beside Narcissa. It was sickening the way they were constantly after each other and if I cared enough about Lucius's marriage, I'd tell him about the countless times that Narcissa had gone to Severus's bed instead of their own.  
  
As the last of the Death Eaters present filled into the dining room, Lord Voldemort moves toward the table and stands beside the head chair. I watch as he slowly takes his seat and looks to us. I wonder how long he will make us wait before telling us to be seated ourselves but it is not long this time. The sound of several chairs being pulled across the marble floor fills the vaulted ceilings and the golden platters instantly fill with rich and lavish foods.  
  
I fill my plate, though I am not really hungry for Athena had made a very satisfying dinner earlier, yet I eat only to show that I am not suspicious of the food. My mind is racing with thoughts and ideas of what the Dark Lord could possibly ask of me. In my six years of service, I have never been asked to do something by Lord Voldemort himself and I find it slightly disturbing.  
  
"Regulus, you are loyal to me, are you not?" I hear him ask me, and I nod in response.  
  
"Of course, my Lord. I live only to serve you and your purpose. My life is for no other reason," I say, taking no notice of the glares from the three sitting across from me.  
  
He nods in approval, the candlelight reflecting against the bareness of his head. So deformed from God knows how many spells he has performed on himself, yet I force myself to look upon him and hide my disgust. "Then, you would do any service I would ask of you, regardless, correct?"  
  
I grow more nervous as we speak, hoping that he cannot sense my discomfort. Did he learn of my secret? Of Athena and Demeter? I pray to myself that he did not for I would rather die than hurt either of them and not even my service to the Dark Lord could change my opinion on that. Hesitantly, I nod once again and wait for his request.  
  
"I want you to find and kill Sirius Black."  
  
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AN: OMG...I am NEVER writing another story in 1st person after this. I don't know how some people do it and the only reason I did it here was to keep with the theme set by Epiphanies. It's so hard to keep with the same tenses and I personally don't like it because it's very limiting to the thoughts and emotions of others, which I love to expose for everyone to see. The only other one I've ever written that was 1st person was A Lifetime of Wondering, which was easier because it was only focusing on Brutus and his thoughts and he didn't interact within everyone. But anyways, I hope you guys liked it and I hope I am doing justice to Yukirei's story. I will hopefully get the next couple of parts finished and up soon, but I'm going to be busy these next few weeks with Necronomicon and school. But please please please please please please please please please please PLEASE R/R!!!! 


	2. Remembrance

My throat tightens and I force myself to swallow the piece of ham that I had been chewing. Why did I feel this way? Why was I hesitant to kill my brother, who was a disgrace to our family? "Sirius? But I do not know of his whereabouts, my Lord, nor do I have any possible idea." His crimson eyes look to me, angry that one of his subordinates is questioning him and I instantly regret letting the words leave my mouth. "I apologize, my Lord. I did not mean to question you it is only that I assure you that I have no knowledge of where Sirius might be. It has been many years since I have contacted him."  
  
The Dark Lord makes something that resembles a smile with his thin mouth and I cannot fathom what thoughts are running through his mind. A quiet chuckle leaves his mouth and for an instant, I think I know where this conversation is heading. "Do you wish for me to contact him and deceive him, my Lord?"  
  
"He would not expect it from his own brother, Regulus. It'd be much too easy and no doubt he would welcome you with open arms, as he is pathetically weak when it comes to helping someone," he says, his contorted face beaming with the mastery of his plan.  
  
I know I should say yes immediately, after all, what had Sirius done for me? Absolutely nothing, he had only caused Mother and Father much distress for his failure to uphold the name of Black. The most ancient and noble house of Black, as was embroidered on the family tapestry. Toujours Pur - Always Pure. Yet Sirius lessens himself to associate with Mudbloods and Muggle.  
  
The idea of killing such a filthy man should be appealing, but it isn't and my hesitation is beginning to bother the Dark Lord as he raises a browless forehead in expectation of an answer. I sigh and raise my head, looking to Lucius and Narcissa, both of which seem positively pleased to be rid of the black sheep of the Black house. A few seats down is Narcissa's sister, Bellatrix, sitting on the edge of her seat, who also seems to share their joy.  
  
"As you wish, my Lord," I reply, and he smiles with approval. Afterwards, I find the food to taste bland and I lost my appetite. I did not notice that the Dark Lord had risen and was making a toast until I feel the steel tip of Lucius's boot bore into my shin, and like the rest of the Death Eaters, I raise my glass and toast his definite victory.  
  
The evening slowly came to an end and I am relieved to finally return to my home, to the warmth of Athena's arms. Yet the decision to kill Sirius is still bothering me, and I cannot figure out why. Why did this bother me so?  
  
***************  
  
I Apparate inside the living room and the fire is still crackling, the last of the embers starting to fade to darkness. God, how I love Athena and I truly don't deserve her, not with everything I put her through. She's so understanding of everything and of my loyalty to the Dark Lord, yet she stands by my side. Sometimes I wonder why she married me in the first place, she certainly could have done much better but then again, I don't think I could live without her in my life.  
  
I walk the ivory stairs that lead to our bedroom and slowly open the door. Athena is already in bed, her dreams filled with visions and I wonder what it is she dreams of. I remove my cloak and toss it in a chair in the closet as I slide my feet out of the shoes. My mind is racing with the thought of killing Sirius. Goddamn it! Why is this bothering me so much? I don't care about him and I haven't seen or spoken with him in the four years since he graduated from Hogwarts.  
  
I unbuckle the belt around my waist and pull off my pants, replacing them with a set of blue satin pajama pants. The sheets rustle and I glance at Athena to see if she has awakened and thankfully, she has not. As I pull my shirt off over my head, I slide into the bed and wrap my arms around my wife's waist, scooting closer to her to where her body is pressed firmly against mine. The scents of her oils fill my nose, of sweet pea and grapefruit and I watch as she sleeps.  
  
Sleep didn't come for me though and had Athena been awake, she would tell me that I had upset the Gods and that Hypnos was forcing me to reflect on my current decisions. So intelligent she was, so insightful, but she was a Seer, as had been all the women of her family and such insight was expected. Have I made the right decision? Is there a reason that I should not bring Sirius' pathetic excuse for a life to an end? I spend the night pondering my response.  
  
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Yet, at some point during the night, Hypnos finally let me sleep. Either that or Athena must have given me something to bring a heavy sleep for I did not wake until the sun had well risen into the early afternoon. I pull myself up and sit in the large bed, placing my head between my hands, rubbing my temples.  
  
"Daddy's awake!"  
  
The sound of my daughter's voice brings me from my troubles and I reach out as she jumps up onto the bed and crawls into my lap, her tiny arms wrapping around my neck. I hold her closely and kiss her forehead. "Good morning, my princess," I answer, tickling her sides. She laughs and squirms under my hands but I catch her again and continue to tickled her baby fat that would in time flatten and become a woman's body.  
  
Fathers don't like to imagine their little girls growing up and becoming another man's possession and I am no exception, yet it brings me warmth knowing that something I helped to produce will turn out so wonderful, so beautiful and part of me looks forward to seeing Demeter grow up. The other part wishes that I could relish in moments like these forever but alas, I cannot. Not as long as the Dark Mark calls for me to serve the Dark Lord.  
  
Demeter finally manages to free herself from my tickling hands and she runs to the center of the bedroom. I smile and slowly start to inch towards her, and every move forward makes my girl move back. I lean over the edge of the bed and look at the child lingering in the doorway. She giggles and runs off down the hall, and I quickly jump from the bed to follow her as she runs down the stairs and into the living room. I stay far enough behind that she thinks that she is winning and getting away but close enough to be able to take her in my arms and tickle her pudgy belly with one move.  
  
"I'm going to get you, Demeter! I'm going to get you!" I taunt and she sticks her tongue out at me before running off to the kitchen and hiding behind Athena's legs.  
  
"Eek! Mummy! Daddy's trying to tickle me again!" She cries as she clings to the skirts of her mother's dress. Athena looks to me and shakes her head, before returning to the food. I move towards her and kiss her lips, acting as though I have lost interest in chasing after my daughter. Curious as children tend to be, Demeter slowly moves from behind Athena to investigate why she isn't being chased anymore. I quickly pick her up and lift her shirt to blow a raspberry on her stomach before walking into our dining room and taking a seat at the table.  
  
Demeter's giggles slowly die and she adjusts herself to sit comfortably in my lap. Our house elf, Hebe, brings out a plate filled with sandwiches and fruits for my lunch. Athena sits beside me, her eyes studying me as I eat. "What bothers you, Regulus? You did not sleep last night and it was not until I gave you a mild sleeping potion that you were finally able to rest."  
  
"I am fine, love. Nothing ails me at the moment, just the aftereffects of dinner from last night," I reply. She knows I am lying yet she does not push the conversation any further and I am thankful that she does not. Five stubby fingers reach onto my plate and take one of the cantaloupe chunks before shoving it into a mouth. Juice rolls down Demeter's face and I wipe it away with my napkin.  
  
***************  
  
Sirius stood over me, a grin on his thick face. "Heh, told you I was going to win, didn't I Regulus? What made you think that you could have possibly beaten me on a broom?"  
  
I looked at my older brother and mocked his smugness. He frowned and jumped on top of me, wrestling with me in the fresh mud after the rain. Our mother came out and scolded us for behaving like those filthy Mudbloods. Unlike Sirius, I didn't just shrug and walk off, I listened and Mother rewarded me for being the better son.  
  
I didn't understand really, it was just how things were in our family and always had been. We were purebloods and we were better than those that lowered their standards by socializing with Mudbloods, or Muggle-borns. We both grew up believing it, it was how we had been raised. A hatred for anyone without pure blood. "Mother, why do we hate Mudbloods?"  
  
I later regretted asking her such a question and the pain of my punishment still lingered in my rear that night. I sat in bed and thought about what she had said. "How dare you even ask such an absurd question? Isn't it obvious, Regulus? The Mudbloods are ruining the name of wizard and are creating impurities in our history. More and more Squibs are being produced and the whole lot of them are destroying what our ancestors believed in. Back in the old days, there was no connection between the wizarding and Muggle world. We just let them live their pathetic and inferior lives, and I don't think we should have even done that much!"  
  
Sirius had stood next the bed, leaning against one of the dark canopy posts and looked at me through the sheer curtains. "You know, not all of the Muggle-borns are that bad. Some are pretty nice and maybe it's time we changed what our ancestors believe in, don't you think?"  
  
"But...but Mother said-," I started to answer but Sirius rolled his eyes and cut me off before I could finish.  
  
"You don't really believe everything she says, do you?"  
  
"She wouldn't lie to us, Sirius!"  
  
He sighed and walked towards the door, quietly turning the handle to prevent it from making any noise as he left. "You'll learn she's wrong eventually. Goodnight Regulus." And with that, he disappeared down the hall and I sat in the room to think about what our mother had told me.  
  
***************  
  
For some reason, I remembered that night when I had been 10 and Sirius had been 11. That was the year that Sirius had started at Hogwarts and was sorted into Gryffindor. Mother had been so furious and she said that the Sorting Hat must have made a mistake and had wanted him transferred to Slytherin immediately but Dumbledore had told her that the Hat had it reasons and that Sirius would remain in Gryffindor.  
  
There comes a knock at our door and Athena rises to answer. She disappears down the foyer and I hear her voice as she questions those tapping against the heavy maple doors. She returns, her face pale and I am immediately concerned. Behind her stands Severus and Lucius, their faces smug and prideful. "Good morning, Regulus. There is a matter that we must discuss, perhaps in private?"  
  
Demeter's blue eyes look to them inquisitively before she turns from them to me. A forced smile takes my face as I look down to her. "Demeter, go play with Mummy for a bit while I talk to my friends, okay?" Like her mother, she understands that this is something that I do not wish to discuss before her and she slides out my lap and walks towards Athena. My wife quickly picks up our daughter and carries her upstairs, her jade green eyes suspiciously watching the two invaders.  
  
I wait until I hear the bedroom door shut upstairs before turning to my unwelcomed visitors. "Damn both of you! If you wanted to talk about me killing Sirius, you could have sent an Owl to me and I would have met you anywhere as long as you stayed away from my home!"  
  
"Don't worry, good friend, the Dark Lord does not yet know of your little secret and we would be more that happy to help you keep it that way. Just remember your position, Regulus, and your duty as one of us," Lucius drawls, his voice sadistic and cruel and like his wife, I hate him.  
  
Severus looks at me, judging and evaluating me. "You have not been considering disobeying a direct order from Lord Voldemort, have you? I would hate to see your adorable daughter and beautiful wife be forced to suffer on your account. How old is your daughter now, Regulus? I'd guess no more than four. Though your wife...is she a pureblood?"  
  
"What the hell do you care how old she is, Severus? She doesn't matter to you and yes, she's a pureblood, just as pure as yours and mine! Now what in Merlin's name do you want? The sooner you tell me, the sooner you can get out!" I yell, my voice rising and I hope that Athena had placed a silencing spell around the dining room before she left.  
  
"The Dark Lord is concerned. He is unsure if he made a correct decision in letting you be the one to take Sirius's life and your distance from him last night makes him uneasy. He wants to be assured of your devotion to him and wants Sirius taken care of by the end of the week," Lucius replies, looking at the silver snake at the end of his cane. "Peter tells us that he is still in London and still contacts the Potters. He believes the dog to be just outside of Bath."  
  
"Fine, I'll check it out tonight. Now get out for you are unwelcome here," I tell them, standing from the chair. Severus sneers at me before motioning to Lucius that they will depart. With a two loud cracks, they are gone but their stench still lingers in the room.  
  
My first thought is of Athena and I run upstairs to check on her and Demeter. She sits in the center of the bed, her arms wrapped protectively around our daughter with her wand aimed in defense. I quickly move towards her and take her in my arms, my hands wiping away the tears rolling down her snowy cheeks. I don't think I have ever been so scared in all of my life.  
  
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AN: Okay, now. You guys are probably like, what the hell would Sirius be doing in Bath? Well, in PS, Hagrid says that Harry fell asleep while flying over Bristol on the way to Surrey. Bristol is all the way on the western coast of England and the only cities that Godric's Hollow could be in are Bath, Cardiff, and Wales unless Hagrid took Harry from one of the cities south of Bristol and brought him to one of the other three. But I'm going to say that Godric's Hollow was more than likely in Wales, although the Harry Potter Lexicon will disagree. But then again, this is can be wrong anyways. I hope you guys are enjoying it so far! I will hopefully get it finished soon for you guys. There's probably only going to be two more chapters so I'm halfway finished! Yay! 


	3. Revelation

I walk the streets of Bath, the early evening fog rising in from the Earth. It still bothers me that Lucius and Severus showed up to my house earlier today and I have even more reason to worry for Athena and Demeter's safety. I know these men and when it comes to torture, they are the best of all the Death Eaters. They enjoy it...they thrive off of it. Watching the faces of their victims writhe in pain and suffering, their screams that echo in the night.  
  
I feel his presence nearby and I know I grow closer to where he has hidden himself. I twirl my wand between my fingers and point the tip towards the skies. "Reperio," I recite, as a tiny red ball of light forms at the tip of the wand. It circles me, searching for my brother and I wait until it shoots of to the right, disappearing down an alley and around the back of an old restaurant, before following the pulsating beam that only I can see.  
  
Trash and garbage line the tiny alleyway as I step around the numerous bags to avoid dirtying my cloak. The shaft of crimson light ends just outside of a window and I cautiously look in. Sirius sits at a bar, his black hair in array around his head and dark bags under his eyes as he drowns his sorrows in a large mug of beer. Though I have agreed to kill him, I pity him and his depression. I am thankful that I have never known such despair and I raise my wand to the window, thinking of which spell will best suit the way I will kill my brother. Yet I stay my hand as another memory invades my mind.  
  
***************  
  
I coughed as dirt filled my lungs, my clothes soiled from the fight I was just in. I don't remember who or how I got out but I saw Sirius standing over me, his fists raised to those who had just been brawling with me. Mother would probably scold me for behaving like one of those barbaric Muggles and Mudbloods. But I watched in awe as Sirius took on the four young wizards and quickly put them in their place.  
  
He was always so strong, so protective of me and I wanted to be just like him. I wanted the heart and power that he possessed and I envy him for having his life so easy. He turned to me and extends a hand towards me to help me stand. Sirius laughed and shook his head as he pulled my weight from the ground and helped me to brush the dirt off of my back. "You know Regulus, you should really pick your fights more carefully."  
  
"I didn't want to fight in the first place. They just ganged up on me and starting hitting me. I couldn't defend myself against those...heathens. They kept yelling at me about how I thought I was better than everyone. We're all the same, aren't we Sirius?" I replied, wiping the blood that trailed down my swollen lip.  
  
He thought for a minute, and I watched as he tried to think of the best way to answer the question. He pulled a handkerchief from his back pocket and began to wipe away some of the dirt that had clung to my sweaty face. "Well, we are but we aren't. We are better than those who think that violence and torture are acceptable ways of getting people to bend to their ideals, but for the most part, we are all the same, even if our stature in society may differ. But in either case, I will always be there to protect and watch over you, Regulus, as long as you need my help. You are my brother and I love you. All you need to do is ask for it. Come on, let's get back before Mother notices that we have disappeared again."  
  
I watched as he walked back out into Diagon Alley before looking to the silk cloth in my hand. I hadn't even noticed that he had given it to me and I grasp it tightly before shoving it in my back pocket. I ran out to join him and I found him, along with our mother, who was furious at the dirt on my clothes and I listened as she lectured me on improper behavior in public. But Sirius's speech had been much more brief and had more impact on me than any our mother had given us.  
  
***************  
  
My hand unconsciously strays to the pocket inside that lines the inside of my cloak and my fingers trail along the tip of the silk cloth. I pull it out and look at it, running my finger over the Black family crest. I had wanted to be like him, he had been my role model at one point and now I stand here, preparing to bring his death. Ironic how life throws those unusual corkscrew. I look inside once more and he seems to have drunk at least another two mugs of beer.  
  
I want to run inside and thank him, I want to tell him that even though our paths were long separated, I still want to be in his life, be his brother again. I miss everything about it - the talks, the fights, the brotherly competition - and I realize that I regret taking on this job, this impossible task of being my brother's executioner. How could they possibly have asked such a ridiculous thing of me?  
  
I gently tap against the window and Sirius's head shoots up, his brown eyes filled with fear. He mouth moves and I assume he has recognized me. I watch as he runs out the door and I suddenly feel as though I am unworthy to face him. I quickly Apparate from the alley, but close enough to where I can watch his reaction. He turns the alley and looks for me. I hear him call my name and I force myself not to call out a response.  
  
The disappointment that blankets his face fills me with an unexplainable grief and he turns to depart back to his lonely barstool. Sirius stops and looks behind him again and I notice what he must have also noticed. A single white handkerchief laid in the middle of alley, the crest of the Black house calling to both of us. His calloused hands slowly reach down and pick it up from the damp stone street before he looks around again. He slowly backs away and disappears from the alley. "Goodbye, Sirius. I'm so sorry for everything that has happened between us," I say to no one but myself and I return to my home in London.  
  
***************  
  
The time is 11:30 and I enter the last day of my life for I have now betrayed the Dark Lord and he will send someone to dispose of me as soon as he receives word of my failure to kill Sirius. Though Demeter is not awake to welcome me, Athena is and she sits at the dining room table, her cheeks stained with saltine tears that she has been crying. "I read them all, Regulus. I tried to find one that told me otherwise and yet, they all refuse to aid one of their own. I cannot let you leave me here alone, for I do not think I could survive without you," she whispers, looking from her tarot cards to the several cups of tea leaves. Numerous books on the alignment of the stars lay open on the table, the pages marked with Latin and Celtic symbols that only Athena knew how to read.  
  
I crouch before her and rest my head in lap, and I begin to cry. She simply runs her hands over my head, smoothing back my hair and I feel her shake as she too cries. I cannot bear to think of the pain I am about to bring her, the suffering she will face but I know I must send them away, as far as I possibly can. "Athena," I begin, clearing my voice and taking her face in my hands. "Athena, listen to me. Pack what you need and go to my cousin, Andromeda. Tell her that I will ask only this one favor of her and I wa-"  
  
"I will not leave you, Regulus. I cannot and I ask that you do not ask me to do so. If you intend to run, then I shall follow you. When I took you as my husband, I pledged my undying love to you and that I would stay by you until death. And should death come for you tomorrow, Regulus, then I intend to go with you," Athena replies, covering my mouth with two long fingers. I take one of her hands and press it against my cheek and nothing I would tell her would cause her disposition to waver.  
  
"Then let us take Demeter to Andromeda tonight, for she deserves a better life than what I have given her," I say, standing to walk to our daughter's room. Sadness rips at my heart and I feel as though it is being slowly pushed through a meat grinder. I want to slit my own wrists to end the pain sooner but I will not run from this fight that I have brought upon myself. I will not ask for help and if I should I die doing it, I will protect Athena so that she may live to see Demeter grow.  
  
I stand over Demeter's bed and I do not bother to hold back my tears. It's not like I didn't know that I would eventually have to part from our love but I never thought it would have to be so soon. Any dreams of watching her grow and seeing her mount a broom for the first time were fleeing from my mind and I carefully pick up her light body, holding her in my arms. I still cannot believe that I had helped create such a beautiful thing and I envy my cousin who will now take Athena's place and her husband, who will take mine.  
  
An hour passes and I still look to my daughter, I still kiss her forehead every few minutes. She sleeps so soundly, unaware of the tribulations that I now face and the depression that has been eating at my heart. Her tiny mouth is partially open and one thumb is shoved in between her still developing teeth. Athena comes in and looks to the child in my arms, her fingers tracing Demeter's smooth, pudgy cheek.  
  
"Stay with her a while and I will finish packing her things, then we must leave. It will not be long before the Dark Lord find outs what has happened," I whisper, passing Demeter to her mother and she mumbles something undistinguishable in her sleep. The loss of the weight in my arms is great and I immediately feel even more sorrow. That is the last time that I would ever be able to truly hold my daughter in my arms. Athena takes my seat in the corner of the playroom and I slowly and hesitantly disappear to finish gathering the last of her things.  
  
I hear Athena's soothing voice as she sings an old Irish song, though her voice falters with every heartbreaking word of the slow hymn. "Over in Killarney many years ago, me mother sang a song to me. In tones so sweet and low. Just a simple little ditty, in her good old Irish way. And I'd give the world if she could sing, that song to me this day. Oft in dreams I wander, to that cot again. I feel her arms a-hugging me as when she held me then. And I hear her voice a-humming, to me as in days of yore. When she used to rock me fast asleep, outside the cabin door."  
  
I listen as she finishes the lullaby and force myself to focus on the task at hand. I briefly think back to when I first learned that Athena was of Irish decent and though her hair is a dark as the night, her heart is that of the Irishmen. Would Demeter remember the song her mother just sang to her? Would she remember the color of her azure eyes and obsidian hair? Or the softness of Athena's skin and the smells that often surrounded her?  
  
I do not wish to imagine the possibility of Demeter forgetting us, her true parents, and I sit down at the table in her room to write a letter to her. She will not read it for another seven years but I hope that she will understand why this had to happen to her. Three pages later, I pull out an envelope and seal it with the Black family crest. I run my fingers over the cool, scarlet wax and carefully place the letter in her bag. I look to the mahogany grandfather clock that stands against the wall. Only 40 minutes have passed and I decide to give Athena the same amount of time alone with Demeter as I had.  
  
I walk around the bedroom and pick up one of Demeter's toys, a stuffed ghost doll that she usually slept with at night. I smile and place it on top of the bag so I remember to give it to her. True that only four years have passed but it feels like a lifetime of memories have occurred in this room. From her birth by the midwives to her first steps and it will all be destroyed as soon as they discover what I have done.  
  
Slowly I walk back to the playroom where Athena sits, still stroking the gentle curls that surround Demeter's head. I place my hands on her shoulder and rub them soothingly. "You can hold her on the way. Apparating would be the safest way to get there though you'd only hold her for a few minutes more," I force myself to say and surprisingly Athena is strong about it.  
  
"I know." She tightly holds onto Demeter as she walks to our daughter's bedroom and I follow her, taking up the bag. I gently kiss the little brow and hold on to Athena's waist. I focus on Andromeda's home and with a loud, reverberating crack our manor is completely empty.  
  
***********************************  
  
Woohoo! I got my first review! Thanks chang-chan boogie and I'm glad you like it! Well, we've entered the last few hours of Regulus's life and hopefully, I will get the last chapter up for you guys soon! Unfortunately, I've kinda lost my HP streak and am currently on a Buffy/Angel mood plus my boyfriend has been distracting me from my writing. But I promise it will be up within a couple of weeks! 


	4. Regulus

We appear just outside of the home of my cousin and I look around to make sure no one followed us before I ring the doorbell. I watch as a light comes on from upstairs and then trickle down to the foyer as Andromeda's husband staggered to the door. He looks out the window before he opens the door and peers out, his eyes looking over me.  
  
"Can I help you, sir?" He asks, rubbing his eyes. He is dressed simply, the bulging of his stomach covered in a worn out white shirt and his legs are covered with plan blue pants.  
  
"Yes, I am Andromeda's cousin, Regulus Black and this is my wife, Athena. Is there any way that I can speak with her? It's of vital importance," I reply.  
  
He nods and opens the door to allow Athena and I to enter his home. It's quaint and filled with Muggle artifacts. Had I been in this house a few weeks ago, I would have killed the residents for even owning such disgusting things but now I look at their uniqueness and marvel at how the Muggles survive without magic.  
  
Andromeda was already coming to join us before her husband could wake her. Her hands covered her mouth and she looks to me with concern. Her green eyes looks over me, taking in my current appearance I know I have changed much since she last saw me. I had been 17 when I left home to join with the ranks I was currently in and my youth had grown into that of a man though she appeared to be the same as I last remembered her and instantly, I regret ever taking the words of my mother seriously. "Regulus? Wha- why are you here?"  
  
I smile and look at the girl that clung to her leg. She looks so much like Andromeda, the same shape of her face and the color of her eyes, though her hair is that of her father. She appears a few years older than Demeter and I know that she will be a good friend to my daughter. "You have a beautiful daughter, Andromeda. What's her name?"  
  
Her chocolate eyes dart down to her daughter and she couches to whisper something that I cannot hear. The child looks to me and quickly walks back upstairs, the hem of her nightgown brushing against the steps. Andromeda turns back to me and moves to stand beside her husband. "Nymphadora. But what brings you here? It's been almost six years since you even bothered to call and now you show up on our doorstep?"  
  
I sigh and look to Demeter, who is still asleep in Athena's arms. "Look, I know I've made some mistakes and now they are going to get back at me. I'm asking that you take in my daughter so that she may not suffer on my part."  
  
My cousin looks at the child and her face drops. She gently brushes back a strand of the dark curls lining her tiny forehead as she slowly looks to me again and I cringe at the anger and resentment in her eyes. "You got in too deep, didn't you, Regulus?"  
  
I say nothing and merely turn my back to her, slowly letting my gaze drift to the ceiling. I feel her hand slide over my shoulder and give it a small squeeze and comfort begins to come over me. Athena forces a smile to creep across her face though I know she is dying within yet she would not show that to the world. "Regulus," I hear Andromeda say, though it is barely above a whisper. "I forgive you for your foolishness as a boy and I would be honored to take care of Demeter. I will not let her forget you or Athena but you must go before they find out you are here."  
  
Athena can longer hold her pain in and she begins to cry softly, the saltine tears rolling down her alabaster skin and landing on Demeter's cheek. I would persuade her to remain here with my cousin but her love for me is too strong and I know it will be futile. Slowly and after many kisses and whispers of eternal love, she transfers to the lightweight of our daughter to Andromeda's husband. I too know I must leave and I hand my daughter's belonging to my cousin, along with the letter I had written her.  
  
Andromeda looks to the letter and she nods, understanding its importance. "When should she receive this, Regulus?"  
  
"When she is accepted to Hogwart's...," I reply, smiling as I run a finger down her cheek. She moves slightly at my touch, mumbling incoherent things in her sleep as I disturb her slumber and I wonder what it is she dreams of and I pray that she is dreaming of me. But she is Athena's daughter and I do not doubt that she has already begun to see things yet to pass. "Andromeda, she is a Seer. She will become very strong in the ways of Divination and I ask that you take what she says seriously because the gift is strong in her blood."  
  
"I will, Regulus. You have my word," she says. There was silence between us adults except for the soft sounds of Athena's tears. As I stood there, I was recalling my life and my errors and as I pondered my existence, Andromeda took me in her arms and embraced me, an action that took me by surprise. "Please, be careful and try to come back to us. Sirius would be most pleased to speak with you as he once did and I know he loves you still. But you must go or else the troubles that seek you out will come here and your efforts to protect your daughter will have been in vain."  
  
I return her embrace and slowly move away for I feel tears of regret attempting to escape my dark eyes. With one last look to my daughter, I find I cannot retain them as I wrapped my arms around Athena's shoulders, the few memories I had with my daughter flashing before me, taunting me. Tears have claimed Andromeda as well as her eyes follow me and I can no longer bear to dirty their purity with my presence. The resounding crack fills their Muggle home and we are gone from their world, along with our daughter who I would never be able to see or hold in my arms again.  
  
**********  
  
The manor is as we had left it save for the two masked men who wait within our living room. Despite their hidden faces, I already know who Voldemort has sent to see to my execution and immediately, I step between them and Athena. "I know what your purpose here tonight is, Lucius...Severus. But know I will die without a fight," I spit, my wand grasped firmly in my hand. One of them rises and I judge him to be Malfoy but his height and demanding posture.  
  
"Very well, Regulus. Though you will not win," he replies as he draws his wand, holding it before his face. So damned classical even as he plays executioner to request a formal duel and I take pleasure in knowing that hopefully, I will fulfill my desire to rid the world of Lucius Malfoy and the Malfoy lineage. I bow to him, though I do not respect him, and turn my back to him and allow space to form between us. I stop as I look to Athena, her eyes tearing over as she watches me and I turn only to be greeted with pain. "Crucio."  
  
Regardless of the overpowering pain that courses through my veins, I do not scream out for it would only give Lucius pleasure to see me in agony. Blood fills my mouth as I bite down on my tongue, hoping the pain will cease and I find I cannot move. My vision wavers between the light and spots of color; and from the corner of my eyes, I see Severus's hands wrapped around Athena's wrist, forcing her to watch me writhe.  
  
"What do you think we should do with her, Lucius?" He asks, running his fingers down her cheek and she snaps her head from his grasp, her eyes only focused on me.  
  
"Don't you dare...touch her...or I will kill you! Bastards!" The pain does not bother me as I force myself to stand, or rather the anger has driven me to forget its presence as I turn and grasp the sword that decorated my wall. I spit the bitter blood from my mouth, the thick crimson life staining the hardwood floor. The saber is cool in my hand and it has been many years since I held it, yet the skill always remains. A swordsman never forgets the art.  
  
Lucius lowers his mask and glares at me, his wand raised in his hands as his grey eyes pierce through mine. I growl and charge at him, aiming for his heart though I know he lacks one. As I draw closer to him, he sneers and shakes his head. "Futile efforts...CRUCIO!!"  
  
Once again my body is claimed by pain and I halt in my path, letting the weight of my body sink to the floor as my nails dig into the shirt and rip it from my body, clawing at the undying pain in my chest. The saber lays forgotten to my side and I feel Lucius's hand wrap around my long locks of hair, pulling my face from the floor as he averts my attention to Athena.  
  
Underneath her chin rests a dagger held there by Severus and I see the scarlet blood beginning to trail down her pale neck and the contrast of color is incredible. The same color flares in my eyes as I grow to hate them more for touching her with their murderous hands. Lucius lowers himself to my position and forcefully takes my jaw in his hands, squeezing my face tightly so that his long nails draw more of my own blood. "You see what happens when you defy the Dark Lord, Regulus? Do you see what your dishonesty and disloyalty has brought you? But do not fear...I will see to it that you meet with her soon. But unfortunately, Severus has been feeling lonely for quite some time and he's taken a fancy to you wife...," Lucius said, shoving my face to the ground.  
  
Athena screams and I hear her call my name but I cannot move from the effects of Lucius's curse and I know that I am in fact weaker than they are. I cough, spilling my blood on my exposed chest and wooden floors as I crawl towards Athena. My vision continues to grow black as I see the form of Severus lowering himself onto my wife's body but an emerald green light consumes me and my existence is ripped from the word.  
  
The pain ends as newfound tranquility takes over me and I know that despite what was happening when I left my body, I will see Athena soon and she will love me as she always has. Time will pass and though it might be many years away, I will also see my daughter again and she will run to me and wrap her arms around me. True that my life was not as magnificent as it could have been and there are many things I would have changed, but the one thing I do not regret was bringing into this world a child that would be able to change it.  
  
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AN: WOOHOO!! It's finished! Go me! I love how this came to an end! Thanks to everyone who reviewed and I hope you guys enjoyed it so much! Once again, I have to send many many thanks to Yukirei for the inspiration and I hope that I did you story justice. Anyways, I will hopefully be getting the first part to this started sometime soon since this is really a prequel...go figure I have to write all of my stories out of order. 


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